Breaking the guidelines of others
As some of you know, I've been on a journey of self discovery. Call it my 40's, my mid-life crisis (or salvation), whatever the label - it has been an eye opening, sometimes painful process. It's a day-to-day practice of working to uncover some deep, hidden wounds from my past. And it's also about looking at what society has been teaching me or training me to accept as the truth.
I was talking to a customer the other day and I recommended she try a sleeveless top. Her answer was "I can't wear that!" I asked her why and she replied that 'her arms are jiggly and no one wants to see that!'
This conversation stuck with me and I kept thinking to myself, who told you this? Who told you that jiggly arms can't be shown? Or at a certain age or size, we should just keep our arms covered at all times?! As I aged, there were things - specifically clothing styles, that I categorized as "not appropriate." I had to ask myself the question - is it my fear of being ridiculed by others or is it my own judgement of myself? Probably a little of both.
It's been a constant ongoing battle, but my first step is working to accept the fact that there will always be people out there who have negative things to say. And my realization is that it's more about that person, than it's about me.
Secondly, why should I allow society to create "norms" and why am I automatically programmed to follow them?
And lastly, and the hardest of them all - I need to go a little deeper to understand why it is that when I look at myself in the mirror, I repeat horrible things in my head? Why is my own fear of aging and having my body shape change creating such a powerful negative reaction?
I know there's no instant fix to all of layers, but I'll be here alongside of you. I'm working through and dealing with the same things. And I'm making it my mission to create a safe space for women, to educate you about fashion, styling and our bodies. Through designing clothing for my own body shape - I believe I can offer healing to other women. And through education, we can empower ourselves and other women to learn to love and appreciate their bodies.
It's time we take back our power. It's time we allow ourself to take up space in this world. To show up, unapologetically, and say - this is me, all of the jiggly, soft, wrinkled parts - and you know what - I LOVE EVERY PART OF HER. And through our own practice of self-love, we'll be able to love each other more deeply and authentically. I believe this to be a truth, that I choose to live my life by daily.
Thank you so much for being here and for listening . . . I see you and I love you!