Being a Mother: "Do as I do"
I’d normally start this blog off with something like - ‘being a mother is one of the hardest jobs, etc etc.’ But as I’m getting older (and hopefully wiser), I’m realizing that this doesn’t have to be a truth I live by. If I keep saying that ‘being a mother is a hard job’ - then guess what? It’ll keep being a ‘hard job’ even when it doesn’t have to be.
One of the lessons I try to instill in my kids is that we create our own reality. We tell ourselves throughout the day what’s fun, tough, or boring, and what we “like and don’t like.” But where do we pick up these preferences from? Ourself. So I challenge my kids to see situations in a different way. Instead of saying ‘I hate doing homework’, I ask them to shift their mindset to ‘homework is tough, but I can see how it’s helping me to understand this concept.’
The advice that I give to my kids is the advice that I’m giving myself. How can I shift my mind to see the things ‘I don’t like’ as positive, or at the very least helpful? In the same way I can help my kids see homework as helpful, can I shift my perception to see bills as helpful? To see financial struggles as helpful? To see any challenges as helpful? YES, YES, YES!
This blog was going to be about how much I love being a mom, and how it's the greatest challenge and reward in my life. All of this is still true. But what I’ve also realized is that when I chose to be a mom, I didn't realize how much it would support me in improving my own life and shaping my own outlook on the world. That all the philosophies and lessons I would want to impart on my kids, would also shift my own beliefs.
The old school concept of “do as I say, not as I do” isn't something that works for me. Kids are like observant sponges that see and hear everything we do. So I ask myself to show up exactly as I would want my kids to show up in any situation - to ‘do as I do.’
So today (and everyday) I’m choosing to show up positive, grateful, and authentic. To know who I am and what I want. To not waiver in my understanding of what is true. To keep my eye on the greater good, even when the small choices I make seem selfish or unkind to others. And to stand firm in my belief that the world (as well as myself) is kind, beautiful, and full of good. As a mom, this is how I choose to show up, so that my kids can start to choose for themselves how they will show up everyday . . .